Which Way Do I Go?

I wish it all could have been different. I wanted Adonis to have both of His parents under the same roof. I didn’t want it to end like this but somethings are inevitable. You cannot help a person that doesn’t want to be helped. You cannot change someone that doesn’t want to change for themselves. I tried so hard to make the relationship with the father of my son work but it just couldn’t. I lost myself in the process of loving him. My problem was putting him before my God. I basically made an idol of him and you know our God is a jealous God. “Do not worship any other god, because I, the Lord, tolerate no rivals.” (Exodus 34:14 GNT) I had to choose and I chose Jesus because He brings me peace not stress. However, I completely believe God is who He says He is and will not let me down. I trust His process and what is meant for me will always find me. I’m not going to lie, I’ve had moments of confusion and self doubt. Moments where I don’t know which way to go. Should I leave or should I stay? Am I doing the right thing by moving back to PA or should I stay in CA? These are questions that haunt me at times. These are the moments in which I overthink but overcome. I will always overcome every obstacle meant to break me, I’m a warrior.

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