Self Sabotage

Did I mention I’m working on my anger? Some days I am easily angered and I know that’s not good. Some days I get so deep in my head that my mind just overflows with negative thoughts. I got too comfortable with life and let my guard down. It got to the point where I was always expecting the worse. I believe I personally self sabotage certain things because I didn’t know how to control my emotions. Yes, I know those emotions do not come from my God. That is why I’m working on me. I understand that sometimes I am the problem. We all can be toxic and have narcissistic tendencies. Trust me unlearning patterns is a hard process but it’s not impossible.

It’s hard because I’m stuck in this cycle that I’ve been doing for some time now. This is where I have to self discipline myself. Good thing that I can acknowledge my problem areas. I’m not perfect but as long as I’m letting my father renew in me a clean heart every day, I’ll be okay. I’m healing so I can be the higher version of myself for me, my son and those that love me. I remember a time where nothing got to me… you know before the world broke me. Yet, now that Jesus has put me back together, I’m even better and working on letting nothing disrupt my peace. I need to keep my mind protected at all times because that is what satan will target to disrupt your life. I have the whole armor of God on, I’m getting my life back.

Dear Lord, I pray for a sound mind. I pray that you rebuke any thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that do not come from you God. May you give me the strength to overcome all these obstacles. Everyday is a new opportunity renew in me a clean heart and break off every branch In me that is not of you Lord. Guide me and protect me. In Jesus name, Amen.

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