We all need Jesus. I need Him because nobody ever will love me like He does. I can admit God is working on calming the storm inside of me. I grew up in a very dysfunctional environment. Growing up my family was always angry and mean to each other. I didn’t realize how bad those things affected me. The littlest things could trigger my emotions. Sometimes I get angry when I feel like I’m being toyed with or overlooked. Jesus is showing me that not everything needs a reaction.
When I was young nothing was able to phase me. However, during my last year in high school I let the world get to me. I didn’t know Jesus therefore I had no foundation to start with. “For God has already placed Jesus Christ as the one and only foundation, and no other foundation can be laid.” (1 Corinthians 3:11 GNT) I’ve been learning to break down the walls I’ve built. The very same walls that have kept me from building with God, Jesus and others. Now that Jesus is my foundation I can’t be shaken.
Storms may come but I know our Father in Heaven will supply all of our needs. “To him who by means of his power working in us is able to do so much more than we can ever ask for, or even think of:” (Ephesians 3:20 GNT) Moving forward, I admit I was very stubborn. I let my pride and emotions get in the way of many things. About two weeks ago I got into this argument over the dumbest thing. My neighbors called the cops and I went to Jail. It’s crazy how the smallest things can cause us our freedom.
I admit I was wrong and let my emotions get in the way. However I never had been to jail. I didn’t know what to expect but I knew everything happens for a reason. “We know that in all things God works for good with those who love him, those whom he has called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28 GNT) That experience taught me that I had to self discipline myself more. Nothing or no one is worth my freedom. God has big plans for me and I could have ruined my whole life over my decisions.
Furthermore, I refuse to torment myself when I face trials like that. God knows we are not perfect. It doesn’t justify my mistakes but He knows I’m a work in progress. I’m trying to become a better me everyday. I just want to be molded into who Jesus knows I can be. I thank the Lord for being so merciful and graceful. “The Lord is my protector; he is my strong fortress. My God is my protection, and with him I am safe. He protects me like a shield; he defends me and keeps me safe.” (Psalm 18:2 GNT)
If you’re like me and have a hard time controlling your emotions don’t worry God still loves us. This doesn’t not make us bad people. Yet, not everything needs a reaction. I’m learning that silence is better than any word I could ever speak. Certain things are just not worth it. I’m striving to be whole and healed. “He breaks off every branch in me that does not bear fruit, and he prunes every branch that does bear fruit, so that it will be clean and bear more fruit.” (John 15:2 GNT) Healing from your old self is not easy but it’s necessary.